I once wrote a post on how to win a Twitter Fight in Nigeria. Read here. Several months later, a respected friend of mine added some extra thoughts to mine and I was totally blown away. Reading his thoughts left me with a rather sad countenance as the tips he proffered were actually true to a large extent. Do we have a lethal and unreasonable generation in our hands? Let me not shape your thinking at this point. Please behold the tips as compiled by Noel Ihebuzor (PhD).

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Twitter Fight is an opportunity to have a war of words with someone on Twitter. This is usually seen when two folks have differing opinions and none wants to give way to the other.

Tips to Winning a Twitter Fight:

Tip One: Males, avoid Twitter fights with females. We are in an era of woman empowerment so any attempt to engage a lady in a fight will be seen as going against the Millennium Development Goal 3. 🙂

Tip Two: Erase every sense of shame, logic and self restraint. Blind your mind to reasoning and just get in there.

Tip Three: Smear, insult and damage your opponents character. Ensure to bring up lies and propaganda. Those are worthy weapons of warfare.

Tip Four: Verbally slash, burn, gash, smash and throw that poisoned spear at your opponent. Show no mercy.

Tip Five: Move on after you have discharged your salvo. You should feel pretty good at this point.

Tip Six: Do not rest on your oars, move away and pick another fight if it presents itself. Be sure to repeat steps one to five above. Forget your last fight. Forward ever!

Bonus Tips:

  1. Good twit-fighters are short on conscience.
  2. Better twit-fighters are short on memory.
  3. The best twit-fighters are tall on emptiness.

Now you have those tips. Ensure to use them as desired and make a mockery of your opponent and yourself while you are at it.

Noel Ihebuzor (PhD): Social Development and Education Specialist with UNICEF. You can connect with his thoughts on Twitter via @naitwt.