I met Ojay about two years ago at an #AdoptATweep session and what struck me about him was his infectious excitement about life. He has a unique way of seeing things and an equally unique way of communicating his ideas and thoughts.
It took a while to fully understand what this unique attribute that Ojay has, truly is and here is he breaking it down in his own words. I present to you 40 fail proof facts that can assist in the journey to be an O. J. (In his own words… Lol!)
Regular lifestyle is tiring, reckless living is dangerous. O.J tries to strike a balance, and this is how to be O. J.
- Real respect starts from within, disrespect yourself and others will follow
- No tattoos, it doesn’t add any value to your body, and you will forever regret it
- Date ladies above 30, no drama because they know better
- Arrange your socks and ties in a separate drawer
- When you’re with a lady, please don’t bring out your phone
- Read at least 2 Nigerian Newspapers daily
- Become a millionaire before 30
- Always carry cash, ATM cards may fail you
- Be thankful for your present status, some people are far below
- One girlfriend at a time. This is absolutely okay
- Twit-fighting is a no no. Instead, carefully explain why the other person is a complete idiot
- Trust nobody, besides your mother
- Always look good, it will help you get away with a lot of things
- An ex is an ex, no excuses
- Stop saying you don’t care; people don’t care if you don’t care
- Those girls by the roadside at nights are not for you
- Read Read Read Read! Read any piece of paper you can lay your hands on. People will pay to have you share things you read for free
- Open a bank account for each of your children, pay N1, 000 weekly and watch your kids grow up to become Millionaires
- The battles against women are won losing, so don’t bother
- Always keep your social media platforms as clean as possible, as unimportant as you think you are, some people are watching you… may be your employer or prospective employer
- It’s not compulsory to always hang out with friends. Sometimes, give yourself a solo treat
- You must own a body spray, powder, perfumes, expensive sun-glasses and wristwatches. Women will call you ‘vain’, but so are they, and will love you for it
- Do not join political caucus on Twitter or even online, if you must, start from offline
- Change your Church if the main Pastor cannot recognize you outside of Church
- When you go out with her, do NOT split the check
- Gorgeous-looking women who are unaccompanied want you to talk to them
- Do not have an affair with your colleague at work, when you break up, you’d wish you never worked at the establishment
- The day your social media connections and followers know the tweep (for Twitter) you’re in a relationship with, it’s a downhill from there
- Always Stay Sharp and be Spontaneous
- You’re not allowed to pick Chloe’s Cupcake (Abuja) over Wine Shop
- Always bring a bottle to the party.
- She will say she has forgiven you but she’s going to remind you every day that she has forgiven you, better prepare your `comeback’
- Don’t just attend church services, join a service group in Church
- There is absolute no fun, whatsoever, in getting drunk
- Always pay your Tithes
- Have you ever thanked the people who made a difference in your life? Those who stuck by you through thick and thin? You should, it’s worth it
- Calling people out on their BS should be your super power
- Once you lose your temper, you’ve lost the argument
- When people don’t invite you to an event, don’t go. Sometimes, even when they invite you, don’t go
- Your clothes don`t match, they go together.
Now, who wants to be O. J.?
(Adeyemi Opeyemi, whom many of his friends in Nigeria call “Ojay”, is a crazy consultant, a Project Management Professional with a passion for Branding and Communication. Whenever you see the hashtag, #PollingFriday, be certain that he is to blame. He tweets via @OjaySays and infrequently shares his thoughts at www.ojaysays.wordpress.com)
blcompere OP-ED: This post reflects the opinions of the author and not necessarily those of blcompere as a publication.